Under the Influence
Photo by Stephen Leonardi on Unsplash
Clients often come to me worrying about how to change this or that aspect of themselves, or wondering what is the next step to take in getting a venture off the ground. Which path is the right one to take. Most of us are looking for someone to tell us what to do, even as we resist every doing what we are told! We look for answers outside ourselves, when the truth is, the answer is within. We know, ultimately, what is best for us. We know, deep down, what we love, what we like, what feels right. Our body can tell us, if we listen. We are often, however, not that adept at listening. Listening takes practice, time, space, and a little quiet.
What are the ways that help you listen? For me, it is creating more than consuming - hours online wreak havoc on my ability to hear my own voice. It is asking questions without needing answers immediately. It is meditating, writing, walking in the forest.
We are so easily influenced, us humans, by what surrounds us. We are so inundated with the images of advertisers and influencers, we have almost no defence! So space from all that, for me, is crucial (interestingly, when I need the space most, I resist it the most as well, but that is a topic for another day). While we may know, consciously, for example, that an ad is photoshopped like crazy, and is not a truthful image at all, a part of our subconscious takes it on board and believes it. Begins to compare and measure ourselves against it. Whether you come out ahead or behind, it’s all an illusion anyway.
Photo by Bence ▲ Boros on Unsplash
We are always under the influence of someone or something - whether it is our culture, our religion, our parents, our pop idols, the influencers we follow, the advertisements we see. Ask yourself, as you go about your day, “Whose influence am I under?” Take a look at the voices in your daily life. Are you happy with them? Would you choose these voices to have an influence over the way you see the world, the way you feel about yourself?
When we get clear about the answers to these questions, and choose, consciously, to be under the influence of whomever or whatever we value, something shifts in our daily life. When we take the steps to ensure that our actions reflect our priorities, we begin to shape our reality rather than be shaped by it. If we don’t want to fall victim to someone whose values don’t align with our own, we can simply stop bombarding our soul with whatever it is they are saying. We can pick and choose who goes in our feed - if it makes you feel bad, eliminate it. If that leaves you looking only at pictures of cute puppies, GREAT! How can we go wrong adding more sweetness and joy into our day? If that means you stop watching violent crime shows, AWESOME! Find some sweet, cozy mystery to watch, instead.
Seek out uplifting voices, inspiring voices, voices that encourage you to be who you are. Seek out your own voice most of all. When you start to quiet those loud voices clamouring for your attention, you might be surprised by the wisdom you tap into within.
